In all of the excitement today, I didn't even realize that it's Chuck Norris' Birthday! Happy Birthday Chuck Norris! Let's all remember some of the amazing facts about Chuck Norris.
OK, I'll start.
Chuck Norris is so fast he can run around the world and punch himself in the back of the head.
Chuck Norris filed suit against NBC for copyright infringement, because Law & Order are the trademarked names for his fists.
He also won a suit against Tom Clancy, and now Tom has to pay Chuck Norris royalties because "The Sum of All Fears" is the name of Chuck Norris' autobiography.
Speaking of literature, the original draft of The Lord of the Rings features Chuck Norris as Frodo, but it was rejected because after only 5 pages, Chuck Norris had delivered the ring, defeated all of Orc army, and roundhouse kicked Sauron's ass into Mt. Doom.
Also, Chuck Norris' voice doesn't have an echo. No one talks back to Chuck Norris.
Chuck Norris can throw himself out stealing second base.
Chuck Norris can set ants on fire with a magnifying glass. At night.
